Complaining or Constructing?

WHY DO THEY...?

Hello. Why is there no margin on this page?  Why do those kids listen to that music? Why do they wear their shorts that way?  Why does the school...? Why does the church...? Do you complain? Anything ever get under your skin and you just have to let someone know it?

I fear that I'm turning into a grumpy old man! Help. Why do we complain anyway? And is there a difference between constructive feedback and complaining? 

I like feedback. I love constructive feedback! I want to evaluate and examine how I'm doing. I want to know if what we're doing is working. If it's effective. If it's reaching the goal.  Positive, healthy changes are made from honest, healthy, constructive feedback. But when do you cross the line from feedback to complaining? What's the difference?

Complaining is to express dissatisfaction or annoyance about a state of affairs or an event.

Constructive Feedback is a tool that is used to build things up, not break things down. It lets the other person know that you are on their side. 

Complaining or constructing? 

The difference is whether you intend to tear things (and people) down or build them up! Are you set against what is happening or are you on the team trying to make things better? It's a matter of which side are you on. Knocking it down or building it up.

I've been reading the book of Numbers and in chapter 11 it says,

And when the people complained, it displeased the Lord: and the Lord heard it; and his anger was kindled; and the fire of the Lord burnt among them, and consumed them that were in the uttermost parts of the camp.

Wow! It seemed the Israelites were tired of walking in the desert and eating only manna. They longed to be back in Egypt (where they were slaves by the way) and eat onions, leaks, cucumbers, melons, and best of all fish. Life, it seemed, was so much better back in Egypt. 

The people were sick of manna for every meal, every day. They tried to prepare it in different ways, but it was still manna and they wanted more variety in their diets. 

These people were not giving constructive feedback. They weren't helping God, Moses, or Aaron lead the people any better. They were straight-forwardly crying, "Let's go back to the way things were! Life was so much better!"

Keith Green's "So you wanna go back to Egypt?"

Moses' Response

Moses reaches the point where he is fed up with the people complaining. He is so distraught that he goes so far as to ask God to kill him rather than put up with these complaining people. 

What was God's response? You want meat!?! I'll give you meat. And quail blew in from the sea. So much quail that it stacked up 3 feet high covering the entire Israelite camp as far as one could walk! For a whole month the people would eat quail until it was coming out of their nostrils. While the meat was in their teeth, God struck the people with a plague leading to their death. God wiped them out!!

Our Response

What are we to make of this? I think it's pretty clear: 

Don't complain against God. Don't complain against God's servants. 

The Bible says to do everything without arguing or complaining.

Paul wrote from prison to the Philippian (2:14-16) church these words:

Do everything without grumbling or arguing, 15 so that you may become blameless and pure, “children of God without fault in a warped and crooked generation.”[a] Then you will shine among them like stars in the sky 16 as you hold firmly to the word of life. And then I will be able to boast on the day of Christ that I did not run or labor in vain.

Even when we have reason to complain, resist. Even when we feel justified to complain, don't do it. It displeases God. It doesn't show the love, beauty, and light of Jesus Christ.  

Instead try to offer constructive feedback. Seek a solution to what is bothering you. Find a common ground. See if you can be part of the solution and not the source of the problem.